Many of us may disagree about politics, sports, movies, food and almost any other subject. But one thing we all have in common is that everyone dreams, even those who say they don't (according to experts). Many of us have recurring dreams with a common thread. In my own case, for example, I often have a dream where my wallet is missing and another one where I am in Center City but cannot find my car. Sometimes both my car and my wallet are missing, and I am panicked because I can't imagine how I will get home.
Chestnut Hill resident Tom Bonner, 70, a therapist and dream expert who analyzes …
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Many of us may disagree about politics, sports, movies, food and almost any other subject. But one thing we all have in common is that everyone dreams, even those who say they don't (according to experts). Many of us have recurring dreams with a common thread. In my own case, for example, I often have a dream where my wallet is missing and another one where I am in Center City but cannot find my car. Sometimes both my car and my wallet are missing, and I am panicked because I can't imagine how I will get home.
Chestnut Hill resident Tom Bonner, 70, a therapist and dream expert who analyzes dreams for clients, says these dreams are a useful way to bring resolution to unfinished emotional and mental problems.
Bonner, who is affiliated with the 53-year-old Philadelphia School of Psychoanalysis in Center City, is an adherent of the late Carl Jung, the Swiss psychiatrist and most prominent proponent of the notion that dreams are a way for the unconscious mind to communicate with the conscious mind. This theory contrasts with that of Sigmund Freud, who viewed dreams primarily as manifestations of repressed desires.
"The unconscious is trying to get through to you. That's the great thing about a dream," Bonner said. "It's a very important part of you. In your case, it could be that something unconscious has gone missing related to your identity, your power."
Today, therapists often integrate what is now commonly called "dreamwork" into their practice in an attempt to help people solve problems, gain self-awareness, or improve overall well-being.
Bonner, who runs dream workshops at his school, said dreams about losing something are among the most common.
"A voice from your unconscious may be saying that you are missing a big part of your identity," he said.
Bonner, a native of Pittsburgh, never planned to study dream analysis as a young person. He graduated from the U.S. Naval Academy, majoring in Russian, and then spent six years living on Naval ships on the West Coast and Guantanamo Bay in Cuba, where many terrorism suspects have been held over the years.
"But at that time, we were the only prisoners there except for drunk Navy guys," said Bonner, who was an engineer on what was then called the damage control staff. "It was really slow."
After his military service, Bonner worked for a rayon plant in West Virginia for five years. "It was really fascinating work," he said. "Rayon is made from wood pulp and is used as a substitute for rubber. Carbonized yarns are used as cones in booster rockets because they can withstand very high temperatures."
He then went on to work for an independent power producing company in Charlotte, North Carolina, for 27 years.
"I had been reading a lot of Carl Jung way before retiring," he said. "My wife, Suzanne Dutton, was ahead of me in this. She started me on Jung. She had Jung books and was a hospital chaplain. (She has a doctorate degree in ministry.) She also wrote a mystery novel, so I struggle to keep up with her." The couple has two adult children: Chrissie, who lives in Manayunk, and Tom, a resident of Germantown.
Bonner wanted to study more about dreams at the Jung Institute in Boston, but it was too cold for him there, so in 2014, he chose to come to Philadelphia instead. He and his wife lived in Fairmount at first and moved to Chestnut Hill in 2018. He would take a train once a week to Boston to attend the Jung Institute. Now he goes to Boston four times a year for dream instruction and does other dream-related work on Zoom.
Also in 2014, Bonner began taking classes at La Salle University, where he earned a master's degree in clinical counseling. He also has a private practice at the Philadelphia Consultation Center, a segment of the Philadelphia School of Psychoanalysis.
"Not all of my clients talk about dreams," said Bonner, "but it's best if you can talk to someone about them. Some people keep coming back for sessions for several years. A common criticism of any form of therapy is the dependency. I understand that, but it generally takes time to get through.
"One fascinating dream story concerns the famous author Salman Rushdie, who had a dream that a gladiator tried to stab him with a spear, and the following day he was stabbed on stage in real life during an interview. When he was asked later why he still went to the interview after such a dream, he said, 'You can't run your life based on a dream, and furthermore, I had to make some money from the event so I could buy a new air conditioner.'"
Bonner will be presenting a series of six weekly sessions on “The Basics of Dreamwork,” beginning Oct. 9, 7 p.m., at the Philadelphia School of Psychoanalysis. For more information, email Bonner_thomas@hotmail.com. Len Lear can be reached at lenlear@chestnuthilllocal.com.